Survival Strategies That HSPs Often Create (Unconsciously)

Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) often create coping mechanisms during their childhood, whether they are aware of it or not, due to their extra sensitivity. From my personal experience and from my experience working with other HSPs, I have observed the following tactics used as common survival strategies.

1. DISCONNECTION FROM THE PRESENT MOMENT

It is quite common for highly sensitive people (HSPs) to feel easily disconnected from the present moment. This is a result of their survival strategy, which was developed as a child in order to help them manage and regulate heightened sensitivities effectively without being overwhelmed or overly stimulated in certain situations. As a consequence, HSPs often find themselves more focused on either the past or future than on the present. This can make it difficult for them to fully appreciate and enjoy experiences like holidays and dinners etc. with loved ones.

2. ISOLATION / BEING OVERLY INDEPENDENT

If you experienced feelings of being overwhelmed as a child (Which we all HSPs experienced one way or another), it is possible that it might be easier for you to turn inward and retreat into isolation when things become difficult in your life. This might feel safer than connecting with other people and reaching out for support and help.

3. BEING OVERLY HELPFUL / CODEPENDENCY

Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) often have the tendency to put others' needs before their own, which can create unhealthy relationships. This behavior is likely an unconscious attempt to use helping others as a distraction from confronting difficult emotions. Although this desire to help is motivated by good intentions, it may be rooted in a need for love and validation that usually begins in childhood. Hence, HSPs may develop codependent behaviors as a result of seeking out validation through relationships with others.

4. ADDICTIONS

Any type of addiction is very common for Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) as a way to escape and cope with the intensity of their emotions (often the unfelt emotions that are trying to come to the surface) which they experienced during childhood. The addiction could be related to overworking, shopping, alcohol consumption, drug use, food, unhealthy relationships - it can manifest in many different ways. The first step towards overcoming this is recognizing that it is a survival strategy that was created in the past and the most effective way to heal this is learn to acknowleadge your emotions in the moment and rewire your nervous system to feel safe to feel them.

It is beneficial to be mindful that sensitivity varies between individuals. The coping mechanisms utilized by people may present themselves with different magnitudes and in a range of manners, based on both your sensitivity and the experiences you had during your formative years. Through my own work, I have seen that these survival methods have a stronger hold on more sensitive people (those with high empathy levels) than those who aren’t on the highest spectrum on the sensitivity scale.